My 3 Biggest Mistakes When Going Natural
The many mistakes I have made
Hair | September 25, 2022
Looking back, I can’t believe I made these completely avoidable mistakes. Unfortunately, I started my healthy hair care journey with no fundamental knowledge about hair, which is how I made these mistakes.
So, don’t be like me whether you are trying to get your hair in a healthier state or planning to go natural. I want you to be able to avoid my mistakes and reach your goal a little bit faster: because these mistakes sent me back multiple times, and setbacks are the worst.
Mistake 1. Used A Hair Influencer/Guru To Teach Me About My Hair
I reached a point in my hair life where I did not like getting relaxers anymore and was generally curious about what my natural hair looked like. At this moment, I turned to Youtube to guide me through my natural hair care journey.
One of the first videos I came across was a woman showing how she got mid-back-length hair in over a year or two.
At this point, all I cared about was my hair length, and the health of my hair was more of an afterthought.
The Premise of the Video
She planned to keep her hair in protective styles for over a year or two and document how long her hair has become after each hairstyle. The crazy part of this video is that after doing that and reaching mid-back length hair, she decided to permanently straighten it. (I was not doing the last part)
After watching this video multiple times, I decided to do the same to help me transition. I expected that the saying hair tucked away grows the best” would work for me, but that did not happen as planned.
At the same time, I started to feel the need to hide my natural hair, which led to more damage.
Hair Influencers Know What Works For Their Hair Not Everyones
I had this problem when I was using Youtube to teach me about my hair. I believed that every Youtuber with videos about healthy long hair always knew what was best for all hair.
It wasn’t until I understood the saying “what works for others may not work for you”. That is when I realized implementing all this advice could do more harm than good.
Also, I didn’t even stop to think that maybe these Youtubers are also learning to take care of their hair.
Be Cautious When Taking Advice From Someone With Different Hair
I learned that it is best to take their advice lightly whether their hair type, porosity, thickness, or density is different from mine.
At the beginning of my natural hair journey, I often watched YouTubers with type three hair, even though my hair type is type 4. I didn’t see this as a problem until I used their advice to buy hair care products.
I ran into the issue of buying products that were just not meant for my hair type or porosity. Many of these products didn’t have the same effect on my hair when I compared them to the influencer.
So, I was just wasting money on useless products.
Lesson Learned
It would have been better for me if I accepted my type four hair as is and tried to find more hair influencers with my hair type to help me. I should have taken the time to learn my porosity, hair thickness, and density to help me gain faster results.
Looking at hair influencers with different hair textures is completely fine. It is just that the advice was not always best for me.
Note: If you decide to take their advice, you are ultimately taking a risk with your hair to see if it helps or not.
Mistake 2. Neglect or Hide My Hair With Protective Styles
As I said in the first lesson, I used protective styles to help grow my natural hair. I mainly did this because I saw others grow long hair after keeping their hair tucked away.
I also heard that protective styles keep you from overmanipulating your hair or prevent the harmful elements in the air from causing unnecessary damage.
This is mainly true, but they would not say how protective styles can cause damage too.
How I Incorrectly Used Protective Styles
I followed that video by constantly having my hair in some protective style from box braids, cornrows, and wigs. When one hairstyle was getting too messy, I would take it out, wash my hair, blow dry it, and put it in a new style the same day or the next.
There was no break in between or a focus to keep my hair moisturized.
I made the mistake of never taking the time to see the current health of my hair. All I cared about was the length, and my hair showed that. I had shoulder-length hair, but my ends were damaged, and my hair was always frizzy and dry.
Lesson Learned
I could have avoided this damage if I had given my hair a week-long break in between hairstyles or at least cared for the health of my hair. After washing my hair, I should have tried to moisturize it.
Also, I should have made trimming my hair a recurring thing; if I was planning on removing the relaxed ends anyway. While my hair was in braids, I could have lightly moisturized my hair to minimize the dryness.
My Issue With Hiding My Hair
Not only was I using protective styles to help me grow my hair, but over time I became self-conscious about my hair type. This caused a vicious cycle of neglecting and hiding my hair.
I quickly learned that I did not have soft, bouncy curls when I decided to stop relaxing my hair. So, this is when I struggled with accepting my natural curl pattern.
It was easier to keep my hair in a protective style because I barely had to deal with my natural hair, but that was a mistake. At times, I couldn’t get my hair braided, so I would straighten it, which caused heat damage.
It wasn’t until a year later that I realized I was in a loop of wearing protective hairstyles and neglecting my hair consistently for a long time. So, I had to start over again by cutting off the damaged and relaxed ends.
Lesson Learned
After my big chop, I decided to focus more on the health of my hair and not the length of it. I learned to accept my natural hair and use protective styles to either; switch things up or give me a break.
Mistake 3. Follow a Hair Care Routine That Does Not Align With My Hair, Goals, Hair Issues, or Lifestyle
Many times throughout my natural hair care journey, I would change up my hair care routine, and many of these routines were not helpful.
Failed Routine 1
As I said in the previous lesson, I created a routine to help me reach my hair length goals and nothing else. This routine did go well with my lifestyle and hair goals but not my hair issues.
When starting this routine, my hair was relaxed and damaged, and the goal was to have long natural hair. Wearing many protective styles helped me grow out my natural hair, but it didn’t help me improve the health of my hair.
Not creating a routine with my current hair concerns in mind led to me not reaching my hair length goals because I had to cut more than 5 inches off.
Failed Routine 2
At this point I was completely natural, I learned that I need to focus on the health of my hair and not the length.
This was when I decided to follow the routine of a Youtuber that moisturized their hair every day. At first, I thought this was helping my hair because my twist-outs looked shinier and moisturized.
It wasn’t until a month later that I realized I was damaging my hair.
I was getting more split ends than usual, my twist-outs would look lifeless on the third day of retwisting my hair, and my scalp was always itchy.
This routine did not work with my hair, and it did not work with my lifestyle. It took me 2 hours to twist my hair, and I had to do it at night. So I was up until 1 a.m., twisting and moisturizing my hair, knowing I had to wake up early in the morning.
This routine was too much for me to follow and it caused me to trim my ends often. At this point, I wasn’t retaining length, the health of my hair was low, and I was tired of taking care of my hair.
Lesson Learned
Once I learned what my hair needs, likes, and doesn’t need: I was able to create a routine that works with my lifestyle. I don’t like doing my hair every day for over 30 minutes, and my hair thrives when it is often left alone.
I would moisturize my hair; every week or every other week, and a few times in the year, I would do a month-long protective style. This is what helped me finally achieve healthy long hair.
For a healthy hair care journey, you must learn about your hair. Take all advice with a grain of salt and do what works for you.
Most importantly, learn to love the hair that grows from your scalp because that is a part of you and only you.
